yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
