STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Randomize
