So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
