I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Randomize
