Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
ttyl tear gas
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
