I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
