when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
