But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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