The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
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