I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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