who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Randomize
