I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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