do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
