is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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