I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
