yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
there is puke in my bra ... again
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
