Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
