Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
