People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Randomize
