Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
