i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
