whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
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