I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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