Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
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