EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
