I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
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