I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
one might say we're banned from that church
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
