She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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