why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
