So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
