Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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