Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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