what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Randomize
