her vagine was all disorganized.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Randomize
