I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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