it hurts more in the daytime
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
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