paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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