Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize