Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Randomize
