Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize