Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
