let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
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