i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
i now understand why vodka
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
