so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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