She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
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