So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
