Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
