i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
