She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Randomize
