yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
